Do you wanna know how good our surf session was today? Dolphins were giving us rides on their backs and towing us into waves. In between sets Mermaids suckled us at their teats and mountain dew sprung forth fresh as a cool mountain stream from their ample breasts. The sweet 6 pound 8 Ounce baby Jesus serenaded us on guitar from the boat where Willie Nelson sang sweetly to the tunes while handing out candy to children and doobies to pot heads (He actually got it backwards once and now he’s not allowed within 500 feet of any school…but that’s another story). A Unicorn covered in glitter got barreled and a Leprechaun did a rodeo flip while farting a rainbow. One guy broke his leash and lost his board, but the fairies flew in to get it and brought it back with a fresh sprinkling of fairy dust to help him do airs. And the best part was a man from the IRS showed up and said we never have to pay taxes again…and that’s how you know I’m lying!
…this message was brought to you by guys with too much time on their hands and enough rum in their heads to tint their imaginations the color of 12 year Flor De Cana….cheers;-)